I’m still alive, just been really sick and still navigating the daily hustle and bustle with three boys. Now that I’m feeling somewhat better I wanted to talk about a beautiful, simple moment that happened the other day.
All five of us piled into the car to make a short trip to the bank so my husband could apply for his new card. Or so we thought. It took just over an hour for him to get everything done. Now as you can imagine, when you tell an autistic person something is going to occur a certain way, and it does not, all hell breaks loose.
M was on a rampage. Kicking my chair, yelling about the time he stubbed his toe a few months ago, saying he was going to strangle everyone in the bank, and the list goes on. He was kicking so hard that the whole car was moving. I was being as patient, firm and calm as I could be, explaining like a broken record how I didn’t know it was going to take so long. Continuously telling him he could have a drink of water when we got home.
You may be wondering why we didn’t go inside in the first place. Our car is very old, and has been having issues starting, so I stayed in the car so we could have it running to avoid getting stuck. Otherwise, we’d be waiting another hour for roadside to show up. T made a joke about Flo coming to tow our car (we have progressive), and I said well that would make it a lot less miserable.
So we are sitting there, M becoming increasingly more agitated, T frustrated that M won’t calm down and luckily R was asleep. I’m on the verge of losing it completely. Now he’s started to scream bloody murder as a mom and her tiny baby girl walk up to the car next to us. She asks if he’s ok, and I’m sure I look like some escaped mental patient at this point. I tell her that he has autism, and before I can say anymore she stops me. She told me I was doing great, and that everything will be ok. I almost burst into tears and thanked her for her kindness. Everyone else who passed our car that day looked at me like I was a horrible mother letting her bratty child scream. This woman with her little girl made my day. She told me exactly what I needed to hear, because as much as I try it’s hard to remember sometimes.
That night my mother in law sent me this video, and it made me smile because I feel she knew I needed to see it.
These past few days have been very rough for M, two huge meltdowns yesterday and smaller grade ones. To top that off, I’m seriously considering taking R in for evaluation. He could just be a bratty three year old, mimicking his older brother’s behavior, but if it’s more at least we will catch it early.
So after all of the sickness and stress over these past few days, who volunteers to take me to Disneyland?